salute to the nature

salute to the nature

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

insecure

lately, i feel moody all the time. everything seem not right, messy and annoying. I feel alone, left behind, and dumb!

My brain cannot functioning well, and i keep doing mistake all the time. I feel like want to scream as loud as i can... i fed up with everything. I don't know what i want, right now... material things doesn't cheer me up. Even makeup cannot cheer me up for long.

i feel lonely. be a stay home mom, sometimes make me feel sick! i lost my confident, my brain, and my sensibility. I become numb, dumb, and stupid. i feel neglet, being ignore, and disrespect. My words become unimportant, and myself become invisible. i am the "orang rumah".

uhh... i miss my parent, my sis, my old friend, my college life, my study life, and my working life where i was surrounded by friend, collegue, roommate, classmate, officemate, studiomate..... i kinda homesick...

now i am all alone by myself, alone with juwita, at home. she look at me, i look at her.

Waiting for hubby to come back... it's seriously make me sick!!! DAMN STUPID!


i miss my hubby. He work all day and night. Even if 1 day he stay at home, his heart still not here. He's working 24/7!!! i miss our free time together.

We need a REAL VACATION!!! please... give me a vacation, please... i need to recharge my mental and physical back!!! i am LOST! and i feel hopeless.....

5 comments:

Sherry said...

you are not alone, most time I feel like that so I occupied myself online.

Sherry said...

same my dear oso 24/7 working in mind even back home.. so dear blum balik sms pun x reply.. geram.

Sherry said...

about vacation you say go sabah?

NBR said...

Hang in there girl. Find other avenue where you can mingle with the outside world. Join some group activity which require you to go out daily for a few hours. Don't sit at home and wait for things to happen, make it happen. I know the feeling, because being alone or feeling lonely sucks. Be strong and don't succumb to it.

Sherry said...

hope you feel better now.

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